Beccy, here's some of how I would change it. It's less word for word, and more on how we would say something similar in English.
Change my life
Flying, let's outdistance the wind, aiming for the next stage Start out to a new world Change my life
Next Level Advance your skill Put on effort for every day Don't mope over today but battle Step by step Reveal the concealed sword, bravely brandish it over your head Yes, open up for yourself Brand NEW World
A small dreary room with only a bed It starts from here Throw off the self of yesterday And change into a brand new shirt
The window reflects unfamiliar scenes People and streets all shining
Open the door to tomorrow Aim for the next level If you don’t change the world won’t change Charge into the future Anticipate the future Trials turn into strength Change myself
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OK, I'll look more at the rest of this tomorrow. It's mostly phrasing. I think the intended meaning comes out pretty well in what you have already.
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Date: 2011-04-08 03:06 am (UTC)Change my life
Flying, let's outdistance the wind, aiming for the next stage
Start out to a new world Change my life
Next Level Advance your skill
Put on effort for every day
Don't mope over today but battle Step by step
Reveal the concealed sword, bravely brandish it over your head
Yes, open up for yourself Brand NEW World
A small dreary room with only a bed
It starts from here
Throw off the self of yesterday
And change into a brand new shirt
The window reflects unfamiliar scenes
People and streets all shining
Open the door to tomorrow Aim for the next level
If you don’t change the world won’t change
Charge into the future Anticipate the future
Trials turn into strength Change myself
-----
OK, I'll look more at the rest of this tomorrow. It's mostly phrasing. I think the intended meaning comes out pretty well in what you have already.